My mother, Linda Frye Hartley (pictured here), was
once asked by an individual the following: "Do you believe in your faith
because of your upbringing? Or do you believe because of your own effort?"
My mother was (and still is) a
member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (Mormon / LDS). She
responded to this question in a letter / email dated February 13, 2004 by explaining
how she gained her testimony of the gospel and the church. I personally find my
mom's response and testimony inspiring and powerful. It strengthens my own
faith in the gospel of Jesus Christ.
Below is my Mom's letter. For
privacy reasons, I have omitted the name of the individual to whom the letter
was addressed. It should also be noted my mother grew up in California so one
can better understand the place names she occasionally refers to.
<< Beginning of Letter >>
"I'm going to answer your
question--do I believe in my faith because of my upbringing, or do I believe
because of my own effort? Probably both.
I guess as long as I can
remember, the doctrines and history of the Restored Gospel of Jesus Christ just
made sense. I never felt uncomfortable learning about it. Perhaps as a child,
like all children, I figured my parents wouldn't lie, so it must be true. The
logic of a child, you know. As I grew older, I gleaned more information and the
more I learned, the more it fascinated me. I loved going to Primary on
Wednesday afternoons. No one picked me up. There were no car pools. Our first
chapel was about a ½ mile west of Juana. I remember crossing Bancroft Avenue
when the street had no traffic lights. I was very cautious crossing that busy
street. (I can't believe my parents let me do this alone). I could have easily
ditched Primary and gone to the library which wasn't too far from my home. I
could have adventured to San Leandro Creek, just north of the Bancroft Junior
High School. Or, I could have been tempted to go to Lucky's, the grocery store
directly across from the chapel. That option never entered my mind. It was no
temptation.
As I said, I loved Primary.
Sister Wakefield must have been the chorister for more than a decade! I loved to
sing Primary songs. It was one of the highlights of Primary because she made it
so fun. Sister Wakefield's daughter, Julie, was one of my closest church
friends. She liked to sing too and we both sung and sat together. We even sang
duets in Sacrament. We were a hit--Wakefield and Frye, or Frye and Wakefield!
Not only did I love to sing, I loved bringing my pennies so I could drop them
in this fake but beautifully decorated cake. We were told the money was for the
Primary Children's hospital, and we were reminded every week to bring our
little pennies or whatever we had, to help the sick children in Salt Lake City.
I felt so good inside. It was just a joyful, sweet experience I looked forward
to every week.
My teachers were awesome, even
though I can only remember Sister Painter. I still remember a question I asked
her. Remember, this was in the late 50's, early 60's. We were talking about
prayer and how our Heavenly Father listens to every prayer and wants us to
return and live with Him someday. I raised my hand and asked, "Sister
Painter, how can God answer all those prayers? Do you think He has computers to
help him?" Now I'm sure Sister Painter restrained herself from raucous
laughter, but it was her attitude I'll never forget. She said so seriously,
"Well, Linda, you know, He just might have!" No one in class laughed
at my question or the answer. We were just so curious how God accomplished this
great feat. She didn't upbraid me and she could have. Sister Painter treated my
question as though it was a most scholarly one... I still don't have the answer
how God answers all those prayers. I just know prayer works.
When I became a
"teenager", 13 to be exact, I had the great opportunity to
participate in the Oakland Temple Pageant. This was a missionary tool to
explain the history of the church through drama, dance and song. I was supposed
to be 14 to be eligible to participate, but the leaders took pity on me and I
snuck in.
The Pageant was held for two
weeks. The East Bay would do it one week, and the West Bay would do it the
other week. San Leandro was in the East Bay. There were many, many long
rehearsals. Sister Benson drove Pat and I clear down to San Jose every Saturday
to learn the dances. I had early morning Seminary, so coming home late from
rehearsal on school nights was rough on me. Early morning has never been my cup
of tea, so this was a sacrifice for me. There were strict attendance rules. We
had to be to every practice and every rehearsal unless we were sick. I performed in the Pageant for four years straight, every summer. Pat and
I were the Cover Girls on the very first program. They used those programs for
years! It was a great honor and opportunity.
There were about 300 choir voices from each group alone! We had hundreds of
volunteers and performers.
We always started rehearsal with
prayer. On one school night dress rehearsal, the cast must have listened to
Joseph Smith's vision more times than we wanted to. I was eager to get to the
scene where the dancers came out! As the actor was relating the testimony of
Joseph Smith's vision in the grove, I remember thinking, "Gee, I wonder if
this really happened." Something powerful, something sweet, and something
soothing enveloped me. I had never experienced this feeling before. All I know
is, I felt suddenly warm and calm. Then in another scene, when Moroni--a
Polynesian actor--sang, "I Would Exhort You" I felt this mysterious
sweetness a little longer, a little warmer. The lyrics came from the scripture
in Moroni 10:4-5 : "I would exhort you, I would exhort you, that ye would
ask God the Eternal Father, In the name of Christ, if these things are not
true. And if ye shall ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith
in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you, By the power of the Holy
Ghost, by the power of the Holy Ghost." The actor's voice matched his
strong, muscular appearance. It actually seemed for one small moment, that he
was really Moroni bearing truth. I got chills all over. Again, I felt a warmth
in my chest which lingered throughout rehearsal. I started to cry a little.
They were tears of confidence, a surety, that this Joseph Smith was indeed a
prophet of God who bore solemn testimony that he talked to God, the Eternal
Father and Jesus Christ. He could not deny what he saw. He died with his
testimony. Never once have I heard or read Joseph Smith to ever say, "Just
kidding". Nor will I ever deny what I felt & learned that evening.
There is opposition in all
things. Weird things began to happen before and after some performances. My
memory is a bit weak, but I do remember a time when some girls "got the
shakes" or had some kind of a convulsion come over them. No, these were not
epileptic seizures. They immediately got a priesthood blessing. The shakes
ceased. One evening, I went outside just to get a breath of fresh air. Others
told me something odd was happening outside. That piqued my curiosity, so I
stepped out. It was dark and you could feel the wind on your body, you
could hear the wind blowing, but the palm trees' leaves did not move
at all! It was so bizarre because, usually when there's wind blowing, the
leaves blow too. It scared me, so I stepped inside quickly. I think it was this
same night, after we sang the finale song, the Spirit of God Like a Fire is
Burning, the cast and audience experienced a surprise ending! The finale was
spectacular. Over 400 voices sang the hymn. On both aisles of the room, young
people dressed in different native costumes were holding the flag of that
country. The hymn ended. Then, out of nowhere, a middle aged man suddenly
stands up shouting, "This is the Church of the Devil!" You could hear
a pin drop. Nico Snell, our talented musical director, very calm and dignified
quietly said, "Thank You." and a prayer was given.
So, how come I felt so good and
this other guy was so vehemently repulsed by it? Who's right and who's wrong?
Answer: The struggle between man's philosophies versus God's truth relayed by
the Spirit of the Holy Ghost. Yep, you got it. Good versus evil. Light vs.
Darkness. Truth vs. Untruths or Part truths.
In closing, skeptics could
conveniently "tear my experience to shreds" by suggesting I was
brainwashed, emotional, tired, misguided.
Korihor, an anti-Christ called it the "effects of a frenzied
mind." I believe the key to discovering and embracing truth is to ask
God if "these things are not true." Ask. Ask. Ask. God doesn't knock
the door down and force truth down our throats. Heavenly Father and Jesus
didn't descend uninvited to Joseph. Joseph invited the Lord by asking with a
humble heart. That was the prerequisite, to ask with a sincere heart,
having faith in Christ. 'And by the power of the Holy Ghost ye may know the
truth of all things...for He worketh by power, according to the faith of the
children of men, the same today and tomorrow and forever.' (Moroni 10:7)"
<< End of Letter>>
My mother also shared this letter with all the children of the family. She recorded the following, on March 12, 2004, relating to the letter:
"I sent my
testimony via e-mail to all my children, as I don’t recall ever explaining to
them how I gained my testimony. Taylor
wrote back and said he thought it was very gentle, but powerful. It is my hope that whoever reads this, will
be touched by the Holy Ghost and know for a certainty, that the above scripture [Moroni 10:7] is true!" - Linda Frye Hartley
